Wedding head table: who sits there, etiquette and modern alternatives
The head table is the most visible one of the evening, and the hardest to put together. There is no compulsory rule, only customs, and each one has consequences.
The traditional version
Traditionally, the head table brings together the couple, their parents and sometimes the grandparents or the best man and maid of honour. The couple sits in the middle, and the two families are often alternated to get them talking.
The “wedding party” version
More and more couples seat their wedding party (and their partners) there instead. The table is livelier and closer to the mood of the evening. The parents then get their own tables nearby, each one hosted by a parent with their close family.
Tricky situations
- Divorced parents: if they get on, the head table can welcome both, without seating them side by side. If things are tense, choose separate parents’ tables at an equal distance from yours. It’s the textbook case for a “never at the same table” rule.
- New partners: they naturally come with their partner. Leaving a step-parent off the table where their partner sits is often taken badly.
- Members of the wedding party whose partner you barely know: invite the partner to the table anyway. Being apart from your partner for the whole dinner is rarely pleasant.
Modern alternatives
- The sweetheart table: the couple dines on their own, facing the room. It’s simple, avoids any etiquette dilemma and is very photogenic.
- One long table: the couple sits in the middle, surrounded by their loved ones, with no visible hierarchy.
- The roaming couple: no table of their own; the couple moves to a different table for each course. Very friendly, but more tiring for them.
Where do the other tables go?
Close family and grandparents sit nearest the head table, close friends next, and more distant acquaintances further away. Think about comfort too: older guests away from the speakers, families with a baby near an exit.
In Placelia, tick “Head table” on a table, then pin the right guests to it. Auto-seating won’t put anyone else there.